Chirp off the old block

Facebook, feed me: Prioritize who you see first in your news feed. It’s easiest on your computer. Start by clicking your profile picture in the top right. Select Settings & privacy > Feed. Next, tap Favorites to select people and pages you want to prioritize.

What do you say when you answer the phone? “Hello,” of course—and that’s thanks to Thomas Edison. His rival, Alexander Graham Bell, thought phones should be answered with something different. Was it A.) “Ahoy,” B.) “All right,” C.) “Howdy” or D.) “Salutations?”

Find the answer here →

The feat breaks German surfer Sebastian Steudtner’s previous record from 2020 — an 86-foot wave in the same spot. His goal? 100 feet. A classic “good for him, not for me” if there ever was one.

The rule is meant to “impose a sense of crisis” after their net profits dropped 72%. Not good. FYI, Samsung still made $11.24 billion in 2023. Excuse me while I play a sad song on the world’s smallest violin.

Some shops enforce the limit using GoGoGuest. You have to make a purchase in order to get a free Wi-Fi code. No more freeloaders!

“The Tortured Poets Department” set a new record high on its release day, along with these Spotify records: Most streams of a single artist in one day, most streams of a song in one day (“Fortnight”) and most gossip in one day. I made that one up, but I bet it’s true.

In the first quarter of 2024, bringing the platform’s global total to 270 million. Netflix execs are stopping sharing subscriber numbers. My guess: They’re reaching saturation, and soon, there’ll be nowhere for these numbers to go but down.

That’s up 2% from last year. The result? Billions in losses to fight fake traffic and bot attacks. That’s one thing I love about writing this newsletter — I’m writing for real people!