Mess around & find out

🧽 Cleaning isn’t exactly fun. But the right gear? Total game changer.

  • Suck up dust mites and allergens with this UV bed vacuum (41% off).
  • This double-sided laptop cleaner ($12) digs into tight corners.
  • The Pink Stuff ($6) is internet-famous for a reason. It cleans like a pro.
  • Grab these tablets ($25) because even your washing machine needs cleaning.
  • Microfiber cloths (50% off) handle the smudges without leaving scratches.
  • Puppy training? These washable pee pads ($21) help you take care of business. 

👱🏻‍♀️Anna in Miami asks, “Kim, your hair looks so healthy and thick. What shampoo do you use?” This one right here, all the time.

🛒 Check yourself: Say goodbye to all traditional and self-checkout lanes at Sam’s Club’s nearly 600 stores. Instead, you’ll use “Scan & Go” on their app. Then, AI-powered cameras and sensors will check your cart as you walk right out. Shoplifting? No. Shop-glitching? Maybe.

300

The number of calls a day businessman and talent agent Ari Emanuel makes. He also wakes up at 4 a.m. to work out, then jumps on a call with his buddy Mark Wahlberg (paywall link). Quick math? If each call is two minutes, that’s 600 minutes, or 10 hours a day on the phone. Either he’s got a clone or a Bluetooth headset glued to his head.

📢 Government drone testing is back: The FAA says don’t panic if you see them swarming New Jersey skies. They’re testing over 100 drones through April 25. It’s apparently to improve drone detection and to make sure they don’t mess with aircraft navigation. New Mexico, North Dakota and Mississippi, you’re up next. Don’t worry, it’s just 100 flying robots stress-testing your paranoia.

🗣️ YouTube wants to dub every video: AI tools will soon translate any video into any language (paywall link). It’ll use the creator’s own voice and sync their lips to match. The AI behind this is trained on current videos … and you agreed to it years ago. If you’re a creator, congrats, you’re multilingual now.

2027

That’s the year the world allegedly ends, according to a 12th-century prophecy. The internet is going nuts. After Pope Francis’ sudden death at 88, the so-called Prophecy of the Popes resurfaced with its final line: The next (and last) pope, “Peter the Roman,” will lead during a time of chaos, followed by Judgment Day. Out of the nine front-runners to become the next pope, three are named Peter. No pressure.

About 43.5°F

That’s the average refrigerator temperature in thousands of homes across Europe. The FDA says yours should be at 40°F or colder. Anything warmer,  bacteria grows on your ready-to-eat food. So yeah, check your settings. If your cheese grabs you back, maybe turn that dial down.

🤖 No more humans working: The future is bright, if you’re a GPU or own six condos. Mechanize wants to replace all human work with AI. They say it’ll boost the economy since companies won’t have to pay salaries. Because robots are totally going to pay taxes for us. 

💸 $20 scam spreading: Don’t fall for it. A stranger walks up and says you dropped $20. They try to stuff the cash back into your wallet, but they’re really swiping your debit card. One woman at a Ralphs grocery store fell for it. Thieves withdrew thousands in 30 minutes. Yikes.

514% jump

Taobao downloads spiked this month. The Chinese shopping app is now the No. 2 free iPhone app, behind DHgate at No. 1. Folks are buying directly from China after watching TikToks of luxury items being relabeled and marked up. Now for $12.99, you too can own a “Gucchi” belt with radiation.

🏠 Zillow’s new rule: If a home is advertised anywhere online, it now has to be listed on Zillow, too, or they’ll blacklist it. Why? Some brokerages have been posting homes on their own sites first to give their clients early access. Harsh. Long story short: If you’re selling, now you know, thanks to me.

😒 Comcast’s sneaky offer: New Xfinity customers can now lock their internet price for five years. Talking $55/month for 400 Mbps or $105 for 2.1 Gbps. The catch? It doesn’t include taxes or fees. Plus, internet deals will get cheaper with competition from Starlink and AT&T’s satellite service. Locking in your price for five years sounds great, until you realize the fees are multiplying in the dark like gremlins.

🧠 ChatGPT can “think with images”: OpenAI’s latest models, o3 and o4-mini, take ChatGPT’s visual reasoning to unsettlingly sharp levels. They can describe what’s in a photo, zoom, crop and enhance images. “Thinking with images” sounds cool until your AI starts judging your handwriting and that stain on your shirt.

32 minutes

How long it takes to cook the perfect egg. If you hard-boil it, the yolk goes chalky. Soft-boil it, and the whites stay wobbly. Why? Yolks cook best at 149°F, whites at 185°F. Scientists found a fix: Switch the egg between boiling water (212°F) and tepid water (86°F) every two minutes for 32 minutes. This isn’t a breakfast, it’s a culinary hostage situation.

Mind over metal: Move over, Neuralink. Precision Neuroscience, started by a Neuralink cofounder, just tested a brain patch thinner than a human hair on Tim Fisher, a 63-year-old with Parkinson’s (paywall link). Unlike Neuralink, this patch sits gently on your brain without poking it. The FDA just approved it for use for up to 30 days. Tim even fist-bumped the robotic hand used in the test. Love that.

🛡️ Google scrambles to fix Gmail phishing mess: I told you about this on Saturday, but it’s still going in full force. Don’t fall for spoofed emails claiming your Gmail account is about to be closed down. These are passing Gmail’s scam filters, slipping into inboxes looking squeaky-clean. You know it’s bad when the scammer gets better deliverability than your friend’s birthday email.

Around 70%

Of people are polite to AI. The kicker? All those “pleases” and “thank yous” are adding up and costing OpenAI tens of millions of dollars in electricity. CEO Sam Altman doesn’t think it’s a bad thing, though. Why? Just in case there’s an AI uprising someday. Plus, being nice can get you better responses.

AGI, but then what? While most companies are figuring out how to responsibly build AI, Google’s DeepMind is already hiring for what comes after, AI being smarter than humans. The job description should include “Please stop Skynet.”

🤖 Robocop is real: Thailand just showed off the Cyborg 1.0, and yes, it’s a bot dressed in full police gear. This thing has 360-degree cameras for eyes, facial recognition to spot suspects and the ability to detect weapons. The creepiest part? Its AI can analyze CCTV and drone footage from anywhere so it can keep tabs on everything. Coming soon near you, there’s a robot dude with WALL-E eyes and a badge.

7,000 miles

That’s the range of the U.S. military’s MQ-9B spy drone. The twist? It just got a whole lot deadlier. They’ve strapped a 25-kilowatt laser to it that can melt incoming kamikaze drones and missiles right out of the sky. And it doesn’t stop there: The laser can be scaled up to 300kW in future versions.